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Good Manners To teach kids

Being polite to others is so important, and my mother taught me that when I was young. She would tell us all the time that we needed to say “please” or “thank you.”. Now as a mom myself, I try to instill these values in my children on a daily basis. We know that good manners and etiquette do not come naturally to kids. It is a learned behavior that needs to be taught at an early age and reinforced throughout their lives.

Teaching your child the basics of etiquette is important for many reasons such as: making friends, feeling confident, being polite – all things that will set them up for success in adulthood! The earlier you start teaching your children about etiquette the better off they’ll be when it comes to developing their own social skills with others.

Why TEACHING GOOD Manners IS Important

Human beings have always been social animals. We need to get along with others in order for society to function properly and smoothly; without good manners we might as well be wild beasts living in caves! Nowadays everyone needs some help getting along in life: even adults need people skills on occasion (we’re looking at you, drivers of cars!).

There are some things that we all learn as children that may seem trivial or unimportant, but have a huge impact on our lives. Manners and etiquette are one of them. I am not talking about what fork to use at the dinner table; I am referring to how to make others feel comfortable in your presence or how to properly behave when you enter someone’s home for the first time. Good manners can go a long way towards making everyone feel welcome and accepted into society.

Most people have heard of the phrase “Manners maketh man” and with good reason. It’s not just about being polite, it is about developing a sense of empathy and understanding for others in order to properly socialize as adults later on down the line. Kids with good manners will be better citizens in society because they will understand what it means to respect other people’s property and social space. They’ll also feel more confident about themselves because they know their place within society as well as what is expected of them by those around them.  

HOW TO TEACH GOOD MANNERS AND ETIQUETTE

When it comes to social skills, children are like sponges. They watch their parents all the time – especially when as a parent you think they aren’t looking! They learn from our actions more than we realize, thus modeling excellent manners and being mindful of our own behaviors is the best approach to teach them. Since, they spend so much time with us day after day. They are more likely than any other person in a child’s life, like teachers, friends’ parents and grandparents to have significant impact on the way that they act as an adult.

Parents should encourage their child to use the words “Please” and “Thank You” as a first step towards politeness, then build on that. Teaching politeness at a young age helps mold habits that will last their entire life so when they’re older, please and thank you’s come natural! We should model polite behavior in front of our children by practicing well-mannered actions like saying “thank you” when someone helps us or holding the door for another person. This way we are not only teaching them good manners but also modeling what is acceptable behavior so there will be less need for discipline later down the line!

Your child will be able to use good manners more often if you make a habit of expecting them in public as well. Kids prefer consistency, and the rule that is only applicable at home can seem confusing or difficult to enforce outside of their usual environment. Make sure your expectations are clear so they know what’s expected both inside the house and outside!

WHAT ARE THE BASIC GOOD MANNERS TO TEACH KIDS

One of the most important aspects of teaching children manners is being polite. Helping your little one learn how to be courteous shows that kindness matters and has an impact on everyone around them. Having good manners means treating others with respect, following rules (even when other people break them), and being considerate of others’ feelings – no matter what situation arises!  So get ready because it’s never too early to start teaching your child manners. And, there’s a lot to cover! Let me give you some pointers on how to start off: 

Babies: Start by rewarding good behavior with a smile or hug, which will help them learn the connection between doing something nice for someone else in return.

Toddlers: Eventually try using “please” before asking adults for things such as food or toys so their requests don’t come off sounding bossy! 

Older Kids: Keep reminding kids of what is expected until you see this habit stick long-term – it may take time but eventually children should know when to say please and thank you without needing constant reminders from parents

1. Teach KIDS how to Be Courteous

  • When receiving something, say “Thank you”.
  • When asking for something, say ‘Please’.
  • If you bump into somebody, immediately say “Excuse me”.
  • The phrase “excuse me ” is the most polite way to enter a conversation if you need to get someone’s attention right away.

2. How to greet others politely

Teach kids to greet others with a smile or they may miss out on some meaningful human interaction. Whether it’s the neighbor next door or person behind you in line at grocery store, everyone deserves a smile and a kind hello. It is important that we acknowledge people around us and not just rush by like they don’t exist!

RELATED : HOW TO TEACH KINDNESS TO KIDS

We know it’s not easy teaching your kids to be polite. They might respond with a “fine” or they may just shake their head when you ask them how they are doing. don’t let discouragement stop you though; there are some great books on kindness which will help encourage your little ones in this area. When someone asks your child how they’re doing, teach them to respond with something along the lines of “I’m great! I just had a really fun day at school. What about you ?” By giving specific examples and using enthusiastic tone in their response will make it more engaging for both parties involved.

3. Be grateful

If you want your children to be happy and well-adjusted adults then teaching them about gratitude is key.

You can start with teaching them what gratitude means, and then show them ways they can be grateful in their day-to-day lives. For example, you could have a “gratitude jar” in your home where everyone fills it up with all of the things for which they are grateful. This will help make gratitude a part of your family’s everyday routine! Or if your child goes over a friend’s house for a playdate, make sure they remember to thank their parents and show appreciation towards having them come over as well as all of the fun activities that were done together.

Here are some ways you can help your kids learn how to be grateful:
1) Provide them with opportunities for service where their contributions matter – like helping out in the kitchen or on a family project, it doesn’t have to be major!

2) Teach them gratitude by giving thanks yourself (don’t forget those little things!)

4) And finally, make sure children know what true generosity is all about – Giving to others without expecting anything in return might sound like an impossible task but there are some things you can do for your loved ones that won’t cost you a dime. You might even find yourself enjoying giving just as much as receiving!

4. THE proper email etiquette

As our children are becoming more and more immersed in the online world, it is crucial for them to learn proper email etiquette. Emails are an important part of our day to day lives. As a parent, you should teach your child that emails should be addressed with politeness and respect like they would show when speaking or interacting with someone face-to-face.

Teach them to be polite and respectful when sending an email by following these simple steps:

1) Use a friendly greeting, like “Hi!” or  ”Dear Sir/Madam.” , include the appropriate topic in the subject line.

2) Include details about what you want from them.

3) Conclude with a polite closing such as ‘sincerely’, or one of my favorites: “Cheers!”.

4) Before sending the email, teach them to double check its spelling and grammar.

5. ShowING AppreciatiON IS GOOD MANNERS

Showing appreciation is an easy way to show gratitude. Expressing gratitude must be meaningful though, otherwise it may not have the desired effect of making people feel good and appreciated. 

Kids are hard to impress, but it’s not too difficult if you know the right tricks. One way of teaching kids how to show appreciation is by giving them a simple compliment for something they did well. This can be anything from cleaning their room, finishing homework, or scoring a goal in soccer and telling them what they do that makes your day easier. It doesn’t take much time to say “thank you” but it means the world to kids!

6. BEING SORRY

As a parent, knowing how to teach your child to apologize is one of the most important things you can do. We all want to raise empathetic children. It’s easy to teach kids how to say sorry, but it’s hard for them to understand empathy. When kids know how to own up a mistake and rectify the act, they have better relationships and learn that their actions affect others.

Here are some tips for teaching your child to say sorry:

  • Keep it short and sweet; don’t make them feel like they’re being interrogated or lectured – Ask what happened, but let them tell you themselves in their own words – Help them understand why what they did was wrong by explaining why apologizing helps fix the problem.
  • Teach them self awareness– Helping kids understand themselves is key to understanding other people. Ask them about their emotions (even if they’re too young for words). For example, “How will that feel if this <incident> happened with them?”. This will help them understand how someone else might have been thinking and feeling during the same experience which will then allow them to empathize with other people more easily as well as take better care of themselves!
  • Make sure they know that you care about them– When kids feel loved and accepted, they’re more likely to think about others feelings before making decisions.
  • Model empathy towards others– Empathy is a powerful tool to help us understand the perspectives of others.
    • One way to be empathetic is by being observant and asking questions before making assumptions or judgments.
    • When your kid or someone shares something with you, listen to them and refrain from interrupting.
    • Apologize sincerely when you’ve made a mistake so they can see that mistakes are okay as long as we learn from our errors.

7. SHARING

Let’s face it, we all want our kids to grow up with a strong sense of generosity. But how can you teach your kid the value of sharing when they are barely out of their diapers? Teaching them about sharing is one way for us parents to help them learn what it means to be team players. Kids should be able to identify their own feelings about taking turns or giving something up versus feeling obligated or forced into something.

Here are few tips on how to teach your kid sharing:

  1. Take turns– it’s not just about what you want, it’s also about what others want too! Get creative and play games like rock paper scissors or find something else fun to do while taking turns.
  2. Offer choices– children might be more willing to share if they’re allowed options. Let them pick which toy they would like for now before playing together so both parties will be satisfied with the outcome.
  3. Give them time to play with something by themselves before they have to share, so that the child doesn’t feel like he is being compelled into giving up something good. This tactic will also reduce frustration and anger when they are asked to share a toy.
  4. Try making sure that everyone can get one, so there is enough items for all.
  5. When they don’t share, don’t reprimand them because this may lead to a negative association with the idea of sharing and kids growing up believing it’s wrong or bad. Instead praise them for giving their toys without being asked in order to encourage positive behavior on their part from now on!

8. CLEANLINESS

If the kids don’t want to clean up after playing, it is easy for adults to do so and be done with it. However, they have a responsibility as well – encouraging them will ensure that these habits continue into adulthood. On the other hand, encourage the kid and not start another activity until the first one is done being cleaned up.

9. ACCENTUATE THE POSITIVE

When your child is being courteous and kind, pour on the praise. When they says “please” or “thank you,” tell them that people appreciate it because they seems so grown up! Additionally, while it is unfortunate to see your kid act rudely towards others , blowing up may cause resistance from your children who don’t want their parents yelling at them about something like this again in the future; so instead of using negative reinforcement with words alone praise your kids when they’re acting respectfully around other people/themselves.

10. TREAT OTHERS HOW YOU WANT TO BE TREATED

This one sums it all up ! A seemingly simple idea but it really does work wonders for everyone involved. When parents follow this simple golden rule with their kids and other adults around them it makes a world of difference!

RAISING A CHILD WITH GOOD MANNERS

No matter what you do, manners are important. Life is more pleasant when people show that they care about the comfort, feelings and wellbeing of others. Good manners make you a pleasant person to be around.

Imagine the impact you can have on your child when you show them how their actions affect others. When kids see that they make a difference in other people’s lives with each simple action, it will be hard to resist becoming a part of it.

If you are looking for some great parenting books, then check out these amazing ones.

( Disclosure : Book covers and titles are Amazon affiliate links, meaning, at no additional cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through and make a purchase )

Positive Discipline : The Classic Guide to Helping Children Develop Self-Discipline, Responsibility, Cooperation, and Problem-Solving Skills

By Jane-Nelsen

Jane, a psychologist and educator with seven children of her own is an expert on positive parenting. In this book she shares practical strategies to help parents be both kind and firm, loving yet consistent. Positive Discipline isn’t about punishment but mutual respect between parent and child; Jane will teach you strategies that get compliance from children while still saving their dignity.


How to Talk so Kids will Listen & Listen so Kids will Talk

By Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish

Want to stop the power struggles between you and your child? This book provides a simple solution for parents who are tired of constant arguing. Packed with real life examples, readers will feel like they’re getting advice straight from someone who understands their struggle.


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Comments

  1. Vanessa says

    August 27, 2021 at 10:21 am

    I like your specific callout on “being sorry”. It is so important for kids to process their feelings, understand and apologize without skipping that step. That is such an important step in feeling empathetic and being there for themselves and others as they growup!

    Reply
  2. Des says

    August 28, 2021 at 6:17 am

    What a great article about the importance of manners. Lots of good advice about how to integrate this in every day. Thanks!

    Reply
  3. Carly | My Green Toddler says

    August 28, 2021 at 7:21 am

    Great advice. Some of this can be a real battle. I always tell my preschoolers that it’s ok to feel shy but they still need to be polite so say hello at a minimum or wave as a greeting if they find that easier than speaking up. I like the idea of a gratitude jar, will have to give that one a try.

    Reply
  4. Patricia Chamberlain says

    August 28, 2021 at 9:55 am

    This is a great post! We have always modeled good manners to my daughter so that she’d use them as well.

    Reply
  5. Grace says

    August 28, 2021 at 11:01 am

    I especially liked what you said about children being like sponges; soaking in everything that they see. This post is very informative, and very helpful. Thank you!

    Reply
  6. Chelsea says

    January 2, 2022 at 8:06 am

    I love how you went beyond basic etiquette and into the different forms of it and the WHY behind it. As parents we have the responsibility of setting good examples for them to learn from. The book recommendations are great ones! Thank you!

    Reply

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